#(and it breaks my heart)

[psychicdamaged]

of course keyleth is still waiting for vax, 30 years of heartbreak later. They’ve died and come back so many times, and convened with gods and beaten impossible odds and saved the world. They’ve become some of the most powerful beings in exandria. And he’s not dead, not truly- he’s just in the service of the matron. He didn’t die, she took him and therefore she can give him back. And he’s not even fully gone- there’s ravens and snowdrops and traces of him everywhere. Surely, that’s a sign he’s coming back one day. Keyleth is going to live for centuries- of course she’ll see vax again. What’s the point of living that long without seeing the impossible come true once again?

Of course she hasn’t given up hope, as much as she insists to herself that shes let him go. Would she love him if she gave up? Would she be keyleth, hopeful and stubborn, if she stopped waiting?

[fablexdreams]

"We ain't kids no more."

"We never really was."

Oh, do you guys hear that? That's the sound of my heart breaking into a million pieces every single time I hear that fucking line.

[thiawen]

Thinking about TOS Jim Kirk and Spock and the beautiful tragedy of their story. The way they ended and how even in that they reflected each other.

How they both became swallowed up by space anomalies, only to find themselves in a different time, lost to everyone they know and love. And died alone, so far from home and each other.

Jim, in the Nexus for so many years, trapped by the way it messed with his mind. A distorted dream. Only to finally escape, and so much time has passed that everything he knows would be different, the ones he loves no doubt old and gone. Except Spock. But he can’t go to Spock, can’t be selfish and choose him, because the needs of the many must come first. So he dies alone, on an alien world, without Spock.

Spock, pulled into another reality, where everyone he knows is so young. Young, same and different, their stories changed by his actions. His own distorted dream to endure. His own Nexus. And he escapes it in much the same way. On an alien world, alone, without Jim.

[maraudersmary]

sometimes i’m going about my day and then i remember james potter. james potter who was raised as an only child. james potter who craved siblings. james potter who met a spunky young girl one day in town and they were best friends ever since. james potter who then met a mischievous boy who’s eyes shone with sadness, a quiet but rebellious boy who carried his fathers guilt and mothers regret on his shoulders, and a meek but wickedly funny boy who had never been anyone’s first choice before on the train platform on september the 1st. james potter who fell in love with the fiery ginger girl on day one and never once did that love fade.

james potter who fought tooth and nail for his friends when no one else would. james potter who put the needs of every single person he loves before his own. james potter who neglects himself so he can be there for others. james potter who saw the good in those he loved when they didn’t, but could not see the good in himself. james potter who wouldn’t eat for days because he thought he didn’t deserve it. james potter who controlled every aspect of his routine as he felt no power over the stopping the pain his friends faced. James potter who lost control of this routine and suffered greatly himself. james potter who had his friends support even though he thought he didn’t deserve it.

james potter who finally got the love he deserved with lily evans. james potter who got to see some of his best friends fall in love. james potter who gave dorcas his blessing to wed marlene. james potter who grieved for his childhood best friend before she got to walk down the isle. james potter who saw the love of her life and one of his best friend go crazy with grief and take on voldemort themself, almost taking him down. james potter who welcomed a baby he always wanted into this war torn world. james potter who named his brother a god father. james potter who never once suspected any of his friends, no his family, to betray him. james potter who died on the stairs of his family home, knowing he had died saving his beloved wife and son. james potter who would never know the true outcome of that fateful halloween night. it was better that way.

[roe-and-memory]

for a little while after he comes to radiator springs, lightning definitely is in a constant state of fight or flight (mostly flight)

it comes with the trauma of being neglected and rejected repeatedly, hes terrified the the town will do the same thing to him that his parents did — or they’ll be just like the people he wanted to desperately to be friends with — so on, and so forth.

it also comes with the unmasking process — getting insanely overstimulated insanely quickly because being tied down feels Crowding . and having this many people care about you, to the point it ends in almost constant conversation with someone, can start to feel suffocating. and the fact he cant prepare himself for the day anymore because its such an out of wack routine doesnt help one bit.

so, he needs an escape.

its dumb, kind of, and sometimes his little adventures around the desert suffice enough, but it starts becoming more of an issue and he starts needing somewhere repetitive to go.

the cow fields just on the county line, the gravel road that leads to a deserted farmhouse, its age showing in each plank of wood that hangs off its nails, rotting from the rain and weather, grains of sand embed in each crack — lightning finds comfort in one of those empty fields.

first, its leaving to go sit in the long grass, pulling little bits and pieces of it out of the dirt and taking interest in how, somehow, after years of abandonment, it seems to thrive - how the cows keep living, being fed occasionally by mater, but for the most part just surviving off of the grass in their pen. he wonders why they stay. - he would find himself watching the sun disappear behind the mountains and cliffs of cadillac range, taking deep breaths, basking in the sound of the wind whistling and crickets chirping.

when his fears start getting worse, he steals one of the plastic lawn chairs out of docs shed and leaves it out there, sometimes stealing a beer out of the fridge despite how much he hates them. he rarely drinks them anyways, maybe a few sips or so for enough of a buzz to get rid of the anxiety in his bones, but otherwise he always gets home with a bottle still half full, going to waste down the drain.

doc never worries about this. its a part of the process of teaching someone that Some People in the world arent out to get them — sometimes people genuinely mean it with their care — so he can understand that these mini getaways are just his kid taking time to calm down, rationalize, and figure stuff out.

as the months pass, he becomes less terrified, he doesnt need to really disappear anymore, he starts taking sally out there with him. he lays a blanket in the grass and they stare at the sky together in silence.

the longer he stays out there in that field, the more he realizes hes here to stay. he doesnt need to come out here to calm down, instead he can sit in his bedroom and breathe.

eventually, that plastic lawn chair is deserted in that field, the smooth, white surface becoming scratchy and dirty with rain and wind. no one goes out to clean it, because no one needs it anymore.

[ladybitterloss]

[sherlock-is-ace]

I need to make one thing clear and I know this post won't change anything but I still feel the need to clarify

I won't ever reply to asks about donations (unless they come from my friends or people I know).

In this site you can never be sure if they're bots or real people, and that breaks my heart, but even then, as a rule, I will just delete the ask.

[nana-and-ren707]

“I just want to stay with you...” 

[the-boy-who-drank-the-stars]

thinking about how percy was more of a brother to thalia than jason ever was

[deadloverscity]

dropped new fic and it's angst lmao

summary:

He hates himself for it, his god probably hates him for it. But everything be damned, why must they be created like this–to love only once, even if they are from a family of sinners and killers. To find peace in eyes that witnessed deaths without remorse?

Deva hates himself for it

(Or, Deva is unaware of Varadha's role is saving him and misunderstands him to be complicit with his father action resulting in 25 years of feeling betrayed but the shouryaangas only love once)

[verkomy]

fighting hard with an imposter syndrome today

[youchangedmedestiel]

I think I'm scared to do a whole rewatch of Supernatural because I'll have to watch the first three seasons again.

Because one, it's a lot scarier than the last ones, with shit like people popping out of mirrors just makes me wanna hide under the cover but then you see an episode where someone is killed into their own bed, so there is nowhere you can be safe.

Two, I'm scared to feel emotions about early seasons Dean. I know I loved him starting from episode 3 of season 1, AT LEAST. This Dean feels so lonely that it hurts my own soul.

And three, now that I know how it ends for him, I just can't watch him tell how he knows his story will end. I just can't. It hurts too damn much.

That's why I usually starts in the middle and almost never watches the (2 or 3) last episodes, because the middle is safer. In the middle, Dean is not alone. In the middle, Dean is not dead (well not for long at least). In the middle, there is no beginning and no end. Sure they all suffer but there is still hope in the middle.

[daniclaytcn]

it probably breaks eddie's heart that chris is too old to want to accept his hugs and kisses as much anymore :(

[doublel27]

All my feelings about Judd Ryder and his self-esteem issues came roaring up last night and I love that he has Tommy and Grace to tag team him when he’s lost in his own self-hatred.

Also, do you think these two amazing women hang around a loser, Judd?

[thatgirlmj]

Woke up this and the first song in my head was The Prophecy, by Taylor Swift.

Specifically the line: "Please, I'm begging on my knees, change the prophecy"

And immediately I thought of Logan and prayed he had a good qualifying.

[quinloki]

*sigh*

A lot of y'all gotta stop treating groups of people like some kind of homogeneous hive mind collective, and not a series of independent and wildly different people who just happen to have one or two things in common.